RUSS
Oh yes finally a picture of Russ!!! I still don't get how I managed to forget my camera like every week though I'm a fan of taking pictures. Been training with Russ for a month now and yesterday we had so much fun. Before we start cantering he rears a little but besides he is compliant. He'll get better in time I'm for sure. It's just that I'm trying not to get attached to him a lot. As you see, I cannot help myself. He is just so cute and loving but the most clever horse I've ever ridden. In opposition he is pretty much silly which makes me laugh most of the time :)
Updates on horses and riding
Phew I haven't been posting for ages! This week we have holidays and our 14 exams have just finished. It was so tiring but the resluts are good this time and I'm happy with my work. Let's talk about riding. I have been going to trainings once a week because of my busy schedule and to be hınest I don't want to push it so hard. I'm afraid that the pain in my back will start again but for now everything is just fine. I'm riding a horse named Russ and he is a Russian horse. It's nearly impossible to get him to trot let alone cantering if you aren't an experienced rider. I love Russ actually I get along pretty well with him. Mostly we are doing dressage because I want to stay away from jumping for a little while. He doesn't know how to jump but I worked on it with him and now he's very fine cantering to 50cm fences and jumping them. I'm not scared of jumping but this year I have my SAT and subject test so I really don't want any accidents. Dressage is really fun and my technique is getting better which is more important than jumping (: ! Unfortunately I don't have any pictures with Russ because I periodically forgot to take my camera with me...
A picture of me and Onur,an arab horse whıch I rode for 3 times when I went back to riding. Did my first jumping with him after 5 months.
A jumping session (:
Back to riding! Finally!
It all feels a lot better right now. All the medicine I took is working even tough it took 5 months for me to get nack on horse I am back :)! It feels great to enter the world of equestrians again. I am working with my old trainer in my old riding club so I'm no more going to Horse Village because of some "technical problems". About my riding..well I have to strengthen my stamina because I haven been resting 5 months but still I did a good job in my first 2 trainings. We'll see what happens next and I'll keep giving the updates!
FEI 2012 OLYMPICS
Do not miss it! Will be great!
http://www.fei.org/events/games/olympic-games/london-2012
“Courage, sacrifice, determination, commitment, toughness,heart, talent, guts. That's what little girls are made of; the heck with sugar and spice.”
Sometimes I sit down and think-well the last 2 months I had a lot of free time to sit and think-about the past,about what I achieved. I decided that there's no such thing is impossible and I'm going to show this as soon as I can to people by getting back on the saddle. I remember my old horse Maverick and me. They said jumping him was impossible. We jumped a 1m fence at the end of the year. He became lame and they said it was impossible for him to get up again. After months we were back. I gave everything I had to him and he was worth it. I never had a single fall from Maverick. After him I worked with hundreds of horses but none of them was like him. He was special and we had an undescribable bond. I miss you boy! Rest in peace.
I miss every single moment I had on a horse
This is picture is captured from a video I found in my pc. It's pretty old. I'm riding a horse named Dost which belongs to me old trainer. I went there to visit him and had to warm up one of his horsies. I still remember how happy that made me. The doctors say that it is impossible for me to get back to riding ever again. Well I will make the impossible happen. I'm born to do this and somehow I will be back. I don't care how hard the journey will be.
Life is like a novel with the end ripped out
Thanks a lot for all the support and love!
If I walk away...
It has nearly been a month since I'm not riding. I can say clearly that my butt misses the saddle. Still I am not back and it seems like it will take more than a month for me to heal. Dealing with the all sudden and sharp pain is hard. My family doesn't mention horses to me anymore. I think they know how bad I feel about it and they try not to remind me what hapenned. Two days ago I went to shopping with mom and bought some stuff from USPA. Even hearing that name reminds me a lot. All the days I spent on a horse,in a stable and especially the time I got to watch Polo World Championships in Switzerland on a frozen lake! Now it all seems so past that I can't even imagine myself on a horse. My dad told me to eat healthy because an athlete does. I told him that I'm not one anymore and left the room. A lot of people think I just sit down and cry but no I'm holding everything in. Trying to heal and do my best, I just try not react but then there is some girl who comes to me and says that I'm exaggerating. That's like..wow! How can people be so...I can't even find the words to describe. I'm not talking to that person anymore. Yes, I'm angry and I am being offensive because that person can talk without knowing anything, without knowing that pain. So that person should up!
I can't stay away from horses,can I ?
First of all I should say that I've missed horses and riding so much. Before I dodn't really want to hear about them because it made me feel worse, I didn't want to remember how it hapenned but at school and in everywhere people wouldn't stop asking me how it hapenned and what hapenned. So I had to tell them all of it over and over.
The thing is I've been receiving some e-mails from people who are telling me that I've inspired them. I want to tell those people that they are the ones who inspired me. I want to thank them all for those lovely mails,they really made me feel better. And no I'm not giving up riding, I'm just taking a break for 2 months or maybe less. I've told people that I won't ride this year but I won't be able to do that. I won't be able to stay away from horses.
3 days ago I went to see my old pony Caesar and my old trainer. They made me remind of how important horses and riding to me. I remembered who I was. I definitely feel better. My parents don't want me to do any jumping this year but I will still do some jumping max up to 90cm but NO PARCOURS,maybe little ones? I'm not sure. I'm still a little scared after that fall because I couldn't feel my legs and falling on a fence (oxer) and breaking it with your back...that hurts.
Me and Caesar
About my back, I can walk without pain now but still sometimes there's this pain that wouldn't let me breathe. I still have bad times but I'm dealing with it. I'm swimming a lot to have a strong back. But it still feels like I'm going to break down if I move a lot. That is a really bad feeling. Sometimes I can't sleep in night because o the sharp pain and the painkillers wouldn't stop it. I still have nightmares about the accident and I see myself in a wheelchair. I tought all was over because I really couldn't feel anything below my waist,it was ever so scary.
The thing is I've been receiving some e-mails from people who are telling me that I've inspired them. I want to tell those people that they are the ones who inspired me. I want to thank them all for those lovely mails,they really made me feel better. And no I'm not giving up riding, I'm just taking a break for 2 months or maybe less. I've told people that I won't ride this year but I won't be able to do that. I won't be able to stay away from horses.
3 days ago I went to see my old pony Caesar and my old trainer. They made me remind of how important horses and riding to me. I remembered who I was. I definitely feel better. My parents don't want me to do any jumping this year but I will still do some jumping max up to 90cm but NO PARCOURS,maybe little ones? I'm not sure. I'm still a little scared after that fall because I couldn't feel my legs and falling on a fence (oxer) and breaking it with your back...that hurts.
Me and Caesar
About my back, I can walk without pain now but still sometimes there's this pain that wouldn't let me breathe. I still have bad times but I'm dealing with it. I'm swimming a lot to have a strong back. But it still feels like I'm going to break down if I move a lot. That is a really bad feeling. Sometimes I can't sleep in night because o the sharp pain and the painkillers wouldn't stop it. I still have nightmares about the accident and I see myself in a wheelchair. I tought all was over because I really couldn't feel anything below my waist,it was ever so scary.
Step up even when your heart is telling you to give up
Last week I went to riding and only could ride for 15minutes. Had a really bad pain in my back. Everybody has been asking me how it hapenned. People are so concerned about it so here's the explanation. Because of the fall I had 15 days ago I have a sore back. You can find a detailed description of the accident on previous posts. We went to see the doctor this week and I had an MRI scan. The results show that my spine is injured badly. It's called Lumbar Spine Trauma.
About how I feel, well to be honest I'm in pain but I know I'll be ok. It's just that I'm stressed because the doctors said I could've been paralysed waist down. I'm really thankful that I still have the ability to walk to run... I had to make a hard choice though. This year I won't be riding. I'm not saying that I'm quitting it forever but I'll be taking a big break because I feel that my body won't be able to take another fall. I don't want to break down, just want to be healthy. I will go to swimming so fix my back, I like swimming and I'm a good swimmer.
I will still go to Horse Village and teach little kids how to ride. I really want to work with horses and I don't mean just riding them. Horses are my passion and I will do anything to be with them forever. Even if I can't ride I know that the relationship between me and horses will never disappear. It's something I'm borned with, it's in my blood.
Thank you all for your support and love.
I don't pretend to have all the answers to why bad things happen to good people, but I do know that God knows all those answers, and sometimes He lets you know in this life...
Dressage with Jessica
me and Fausto ( Ece's new horse)
It's a bit too late to post about last weeks training but still I wanted to tell about it. It's the first time we did dressage with Jessica and she was perfect. After all the heavy training and jumping dressage was really relaxing for both of us and she went through every move perfectly. I'm proud of my girl,she didn't let me down even while I was riding her with a broken finger! I couldn't even hold the reins properly but she had this perfect position all lesson long. Tomorrow I will work on the trot and will try to have an extended trot. I might ask someone to film me.
some jumping
Here's the first fall, the second (the one I broke my finger and ruined my back) wasn't filmed.
Parcour gone wrong
Jessica is a lot better now. It was a sunny weekend so I decıded to take her out to do some jumping. I wasn't planning to jump high but just some small fences. Her sitting trot felt pretty good. It was so smooth and she was really easygoing with dressage. Thats why I decided to ride her without a crop and without spurs. I didn't want her to get tired from the first day, I was planning that it would be a soft training.When it came to jumping she wouldn't even canter. I used voice aid but still she'd just trot. My trainer told me to use the crop but well... I didn't listen to her. We did the parcour which consisted of 5 jumps and she was slow but really good. No limping. The second time it was faster and better. Than there were 2 connected jumps ( one of them was solid like a XC jump). While we were closing in on that jump she was still slow, that wasn't the jumping speed. The fence was high and I was getting ready to have the proper jumping position so I woudn't get left behind or popped out of the saddle. BOOM! Refusal. I landed on my left side,on a pole(was front of the fence to limit the take off point). It hurted pretty bad but I went back on the horse again. We didn't jump that fence but did the parcour again,this time she refused the last jump which was a wide oxer. We had the ultimate jumping speed and I landed on the oxer crashing the fence. I couldn't breathe for an instant. I have a broken finger and a really really sore back. We'll focus on dressage rather than showjumping this year till I pass the IELTS and TOEFL and till I take the SAT and SCORE HIGH!!!!
Back on the saddle
Went to the ranch at 4pm with mom,dad and my sister. It was the first time they came with time this year. It was really fun to see my mom playing with Marley(the new puppy) and my dad patting Jess and laughing when she tried to lick salt of his hand. My dad was all like "Don't go behind her she'll kick." hahah that was so cool seeing them worried when Jessica is the last thing in the world which'll harm me. On purpose of course because she doesn't pay attention to where she puts her feets while walking and she stepped on my right foot for 2 times. It won't be able to survive another attack from Jess :)
Well lets talk about the lesson. I haven't been riding Jessica for 2 weeks nor seeing her so I was pretty excited to get back on the saddle and to ride Jess. She had a lameness on her front right leg. The last time I rode her she was all limping and I felt like crying. This lesson she was brilliant! We did a parcour and she wasn't limping at all, pretty much faster compared to our last training session (she cantered up to then fences so slowly that she popped me out of the saddle almost every time). On sunday she had a nice speed and my position was pretty well so there was a DJ show hahah.
After the lesson I took her out so her muscles could relax a bit and she wanted to have some grass (kicking her front left foot to the door). Luckily I saved my feet from her. We had a really nice time. I hope I don't find her getting lame again next week because I really want her to improve. This weekend there'll be a competition in Dila Country Club but I won't be able to go because I want to be sure that Jessica is completely healthy.
I missed riding Firyoza
Yesterday I rode Firyoza and now it's set that I'll enter the license exam with her tomorrow. Both dressage and show jumping. I'm really comfortable in dressage with her so I guess we'll score a high score if I concentrate well. Firyoza is willing to cooperate with me so we make a perfect team in dressage. In showjumping we are also good but when I get too excited she canteres on the trot poles which she shouldn't do. It's totally my fault though. I still doubt my jumping position because my legs go far too back which unbalances me in landing. The essetial is I should try to stay calm tomorrow and shouldn't do anything in a hurry (esp. in dressage). I hope I pass the exam and get my license. Wish me luck everybody!
Caka
I rode a horse named Caka today. He belongs to a girl named Irem,she's a pretty nice girl. We'll have the license exam together and we 'll take Caka plus share the price of the van. The thing is she has been riding Caka for years and me.. I have only ridden him once. It looks like I can't really coope with the horse. Jumping didn't really go well today because of the refusals.He's been refusing the same jump for days,also with Irem on him. That's weird maybe he's scared or something. I can't really solve the case because I don't know the horse. I know Jessica by heart so I can figure out the problem easily by her actions. Caka's seat isn't confortable,makes me jump on the saddle which I hate to do. Looks unpro! Maybe I'll ride him tomorrow and will get used to him a little bit more.
Another girl is riding Jessica for now because she wants to get her license too and there is no other horse that she can train with. I love Jessica with all my heart. It's not that I don't want anyone to ride her but she is lame and I take care of her wounds everyday, I share her pain..She won't heal this way and it makes me feel so desperate. I can't stand seeing her limp. With that wounded leg she jumps with all her heart..she wouldn't let anybody else down. She jumped 130cm with Selin but she is a really pro rider and Selin knows that Jess is lame and she cares about Jess. She rides her carefully. Anyway she's my best friend she knows me and what I want so I can always trust her with anything including Jessica.
Talking bout Jessica I want to say that she stepped on my foot while I was spraying her wounds and I think I have a cracked finger. She stepped on it and stayed there till I pushed her away and I can assure you she's wuite heavy!
You are the reason why I smile
It's about the two of us becoming one...
Sıpacık!
I rode Jessica today but we didn't do any jumping, jumping is tomorrow :) Tomorrow Selin will come too so it will be fun, we'll pick her up in the morning and we will be together all day long ;) nice pictures are coming!
I rode Jess without spurs so it was kind of hard riding her at first but then I found the great speed with using the crop a bit and she was so perfect. She seemed to be lame while riding on the right side and Selin felt that too. Jess is doing that because she doesn't want to work sometimes but she doesn't need a rest, she needs to work and get over that problem.
Besides because of the new horse shoes she protects herself and changes foot while cantering on the right side and she canters in a weird way. It is really hard to sit on her because she is huge! I guess Selin and I are doing great work on her. Selin is used to ride big horses so she's ok but Jess was the first big big big horse I have ever ridden :D Anyway now I'm used to her style so no problem :) She also had a skin disorder and I will take a picture of it. I will look from my book Horse Care and name the problem but we think that she has an allergy for the shampoo so I didn't wash her today. We put a special medication, something black, and she tried to hug me with that on hahah :D My favorite t-shirt (the one that I'm wearing in the picture) is all black now! I will try to wash it in hand tomorrow.
I also rode Besni Bey without spurs so it was a tough day for me but cantering with B.B. was so fun! His seat is so confortable and he's very good in dressage only if you know how to use your legs and you should have extremely powerfull legs. I don't.. but still I can get him to work without spurs. Had a good lesson with Besni Bey too :)
I have to go and get some sleep now, see ya ;) !
I rode Jess without spurs so it was kind of hard riding her at first but then I found the great speed with using the crop a bit and she was so perfect. She seemed to be lame while riding on the right side and Selin felt that too. Jess is doing that because she doesn't want to work sometimes but she doesn't need a rest, she needs to work and get over that problem.
Besides because of the new horse shoes she protects herself and changes foot while cantering on the right side and she canters in a weird way. It is really hard to sit on her because she is huge! I guess Selin and I are doing great work on her. Selin is used to ride big horses so she's ok but Jess was the first big big big horse I have ever ridden :D Anyway now I'm used to her style so no problem :) She also had a skin disorder and I will take a picture of it. I will look from my book Horse Care and name the problem but we think that she has an allergy for the shampoo so I didn't wash her today. We put a special medication, something black, and she tried to hug me with that on hahah :D My favorite t-shirt (the one that I'm wearing in the picture) is all black now! I will try to wash it in hand tomorrow.
I also rode Besni Bey without spurs so it was a tough day for me but cantering with B.B. was so fun! His seat is so confortable and he's very good in dressage only if you know how to use your legs and you should have extremely powerfull legs. I don't.. but still I can get him to work without spurs. Had a good lesson with Besni Bey too :)
I have to go and get some sleep now, see ya ;) !
